We've Come a Long Way Baby!

It has always irked me when people act like there is something wrong with women who are independent and are comfortable with doing something on their own. I've lived by myself since I was 21 years old and I love to be alone, so I want to slap anyone who acts shocked when I state that I enjoy living by myself. I like to travel by myself. I do what I want when I want to do it and I don't wait for other people to join me. If no one is available or doesn't want to do something, I'll take my own happy ass off to do whatever I want because I want to.

As I grow older it becomes more and more irritating. I'm less and less likely to control my inner monologue and I start saying some crazy, obnoxious stuff. Over the years people have felt that they have the right to try to judge my relationship with my boyfriend, insinuating that there is something wrong with us if we don't enjoy traveling together. Or they just act as if there is something wrong with me because I choose to do what I want to do when I want to do it, and I am not so insecure that I wait until someone else wants to come along for the ride.

The other day, for example, I mentioned to a group of co-workers that I was planning on going on vacation to possibly Greece and Turkey. Everyone immediately asked who I would be going with. "No one!" I insisted. Everyone immediately got bent out of shape, whining and convincing me that I should take my boyfriend and suggested a number of other people for me to take if he would not be able to go. People were shocked and acted as if they actually felt sorry for me when I told them that I do not like to travel much with my boyfriend, or for anyone for that matter.

In addition to traveling, I enjoy eating alone at times, going to the movies and all sorts of other activities that I feel like doing at any given moment. Yesterday I just wanted to be alone and decided to head over for a quick dinner at a favorite thai restaurant on my way home from my mother's restaurant.

While I was sitting there and looking over the menu, a lady walked up to the front counter and stared at me as she was ordering take-out. She finally said, "I can't find it in me to eat out alone. That's why I am getting some take out". She continued to stare at me and stare at me and stare at me until I almost wanted to stick my tongue out at her. Even the lady and the man, as well as two ladies across the room kept staring at me.

Get a grip. So I decided that I would take some pictures of my solo evening out, since it is so fucking amazing to everyone. So, here's a picture of my non-dinner-date:



And I actually even paid for the check on my own, if you can believe it!



I even drove myself home! Yes, yes I really did!



We've come a long way, baby, since women got the right to vote! Stay tuned for my next pictures that I'll upload as soon as I learn how to wipe my ass without having someone else hold my hand!

I am Now Pronounced "Me, Myself and I"

I have decided to take a mini-break from my previously planned "raising feminist children" mini-series in order to celebrate the biggest, baddest bitch that I've ever known. Me!!

Why am I excited about myself, you ask? Well, frankly, because I thumbed my nose at society and married myself this weekend. Let me tell you all about it and how my idea got started:

Years ago I remember watching a Sex in the City episode when Carrie went to a baby shower (?). When she entered her friends house, she had to take off her very expensive shoes and leave them by the door. At the end of the party her shoes were missing and her friend gave her an ugly pair of shoes to wear.

Weeks passed and the shoes were nowhere to be found. Her friend didn't even seem to be concerned about it one bit. One day, Carrie went to her friend's house to inquire about the shoes and her friend offered to pay for the shoes. When her friend found out that the shoes cost approximately $400 dollars, her friend told her that she would not pay for such an extravagant waste of money. "I'm a mother now and it's irresponsible to pay that much for shoes," the bitch said.

Carrie went home and thought long and hard about all of the gifts that she had given her friend all the years-the bridal shower, the wedding gift, the babyshowers, blablabla. She asked herself, "What about those of us who never get married? We just don't count in anyone else's eyes. Besides graduating from college, when do we ever have the chance to be celebrated?"

Carrie went to the shoe store and registered herself for the very same shoes that she lost. She then called her friend and said that she was marrying herself and that her friend could buy her a gift at a particular shoe store. When the friend arrived at the store, she paid for Carrie's "wedding gift", which just so happened to be the $400 dollar pair of shoes.

Ever since I saw that show I thought, "Damn right. What about those of us who don't ever want to be married?? What type of day do we get to have all of our friends show up and celebrate?" It was then and there that I decided to marry myself. This was almost 6 years ago.

Six years have passed and my friends and I have always jokingly planned my wedding. It was not until last week when a few of my friends flew in from out of the country and challenged me to pull off the wedding while we were all in town. Well, I am one competitive bitch and I don't take challenges lightly. So, we planned a wedding. I wasn't going to say anything about it online because I like to keep some things private, but I just couldn't control my excitement so I spilled the beans.

Saturday all of my non-bridesmaids assembled in their sexy black dresses. A few of my male friends, and my long-term boyfriend, were also non-bridesgrooms. I registered for gifts (mostly books...but of course). I walked myself down the aisle to the song "Independent Woman" by Beyonce (or whatever her old group was called). When I got to the front of the room, my professor gave a speech about how I would vow to love myself, always be independent, strive for continual self development, etc. I put on my Goddess tiara that my friends gave me for my birthday, instead of a ring because frankly I didn't have time to buy myself a ring.

Afterwards we had a fabulous dinner and reception. When the reception began, I burst into the room to the song "Brick House", and I most definitely had cleavage to die for. I drank and partied and danced all night long. Sunday and Monday I took myself on a honeymoon (and I invited my boyfriend along).

Ha, what a fabulous experience. I also figure that this was my three-year-belated 30th birthday celebration, because on my 30th birthday I was sitting in a stupid ass quantitative methodology/statistics class and I was pretty much having a nervous breakdown over the PhD program. I figure I had to make up for lost time.

It's been brought to my attention that it's a good thing that I did this so quickly because knowing just how fucked up the state of California is regarding marriage equality, it will probably be any day now that a proposition is put up on the ballot that some of us bad ass bitches can't have commitment ceremonies to ourselves.

Sound bizarre to you? I hope so. That's what I strive for in life-to think outside of the box.

Written by Anarela de Rossi