Thursday, April 15, 2010

And The Fuck You Feminist Award Goes to ...Erica Jong

This morning before I left for work I quickly read the Erica Jong piece that was published in the Huffington Post about Oprah. I won't discuss the fact that the piece was very difficult to read and poorly written. I would have thought that a big bad author who probably gave Oprah all of her ideas (sarcasm, duh)  could have at least written a better post. Geez, it's not as if she's yours truly blogging on an amateur blog. Oops, I was not supposed to discuss that detail.

I don't know why I felt so disillusioned when I read the post. At first I couldn't quite put my finger on it. At first I thought that it was just another slap in the face to me from the privilege of SOME white feminists who are so damn full of themselves and their white privilege that they make me sick.  I mean, really, did she REALLY say that she never would have though that Oprah would be a "professional negro"?? Who the hell says that crap?

But then there was something even beyond the "professional negro" comment that really got under my skin. After thinking about it for a bit, I think what is bothersome to me is to watch a woman, and especially a feminist woman, attack another woman for.... what exactly? For not being her friend? For being a professional negro? (I still can't get over that). What the hell is she exactly trying to say about Oprah? She sounds like she is just throwing a temper tantrum because Oprah isn't sucking up to her for one reason or another.

Any woman in power knows (and maybe Erica Jong isn't as high and mighty as she likes to think that she is, or maybe she would know this) that being at the top of your game is as tough as hell and you need to protect yourself. Anyone and everyone will do anything to pull you down, put you down, and you should be wary of anyone and everyone who wants to get too close to you. It's not as if it's a secret that it's lonely at the top, for Goddess's sake.

Reading the entire article and all of the "why isn't Oprah in the dressing room with us", "Oprah is my friend", and "I probably gave Oprah the idea to have her own magazine" remind me all to well of why I am here blogging somewhat anonymously in the blogosphere-because there are too many of these kinds of assholes women in the workplace that do the same crap to those of us women who are ambitious and try to get ahead.

Listen bitches--we don't have to be your friends. We don't have to undress in the dressing room with you if we don't want to. We don't have to like you or even look at your sorry asses for that matter. And I'll throw in my own personal two cents: And we don't have to smile in public if we don't feel like it.

But the part that ticked me off to no degree were her statements that Oprah basically has the obligation to suck it up and get over that little thing that we call racism. Because, you know, Obama is president (snark, snark) and those of us who have transcended prejudice have an obligation to... hang out in dressing rooms with other women, I suppose.

Any woman who actually writes an article with the words "professional negro" in it wouldn't even begin to understand that those of us who survive prejudice and racism never are able just forget about it because it's always hitting us smack in the face even when we look at liberal blogs such the Huffington Post.

Where's the fucking outrage, ya'll??!


Della Lee said...

Great post! Makes me wanna holla! I have had just a smidgeon of authority in my working life and can recognize the kneecapper women in my own life. Why do we do this to each other? I have my theories about this and someday maybe I'll blog about them. Distance from the working world helps!

Heather Griffith Brewer said...

My aunts girlfriend is black. I am pretty curious by nature, and so when I am able to have open conversations with people, I do. Cause that's how I roll...
I asked her one day what her preferred "reference" was, because I know that I would prefer to be called "white" than "honky", poor example, but that's what I've got. It was hilarious when she replied "You can call me anything, as long as it's not colored" and then she shuddered.
I look at "race" as just a difference between people. The same as I look at someone who has green eyes, or black hair, it's just a variance.
And by no means should someone expect anyone of a "different" race to be their friend. Especially when approached with such an utter lack of respect.
But that's just me.

Admin said...

@dellalee they do this to other women because they feel insecure about themselves!

@heather the original article is interesting, indeed, in that she acts like she is throwing a fit because Oprah is not her friend.